Logan's Clinic visit

Thursday was our clinic visit, the one we have every three months. And... it went REALLY well! Our Endocrinologist, Dr. Sirinth Sanda, is the most amazing doctor I have ever met, and a very good match for us as a family. He is extremely intelligent, involved in every type of research, and on top of it, he is relaxed, kind, and very encouraging.

We have to do a blood test called a "A1C" test, whihc measures the sugars in your blood over the last three months. Logan's number was 8.1, which is perfect for his age. As he gets older, we will want the number to go down to 7, as studies show that is the range that experiences the least amount of complications. But for now, it's perfect. Dr. Sanda asked Logan how he thought it was going, to which Logan replied "GWEAT!". Dr. Sanda said (after reviewing his log) "You know what? I agree! I think you are all doing great, and I am very proud of you and happy for you!"

Awww. At first my kids thought his name was Dr. Santa, as in Claus.. funny little monkeys.

So this was our first visit at the Bellevue Children's and it was a big sucess. No panic attacks, not repercussions.. wow.

And.. drumroll please....

TODAY LOGAN DID HIS BLOOD CHECK ALL BY HIMSELF FOR THE VERY FIRST TIME!!

He cocked the "poker", he inserted a strip into his meter, he got a drop, and he put it on the strip and told me the number! Elation! Joy! Hope! Pride!

We all think the more Logan can do himself, the better. We won't expect him to do his own injections until he is 9 or 10, but he may be on an insulin pump by then.

The new insulin pumps are like a pod that attaches directly to your skin, it has an insulin cartridge in it, and the whole thing is operated by a wireless remote. Dr. Sanda said that the companies are in talks with cell phone companies, to combine technology, so a diabetic could just marry the pump technology with thier phone, and only carry one device, a "smart phone".

WOW!

We also talked about getting pump for Logan, and he said in three months (his next visit) we could try it. In the meantime, Jer and I have to research which kind of pump we want, what brand, etc. They all have different features.

I read a couple new meditations in my trusty books, and they were amazingly on target.

the first one was all about getting though life's stuggles, at your own pace. The second one was about surrender. This one is hard, but I can see it as the next step... Not surrendering like giving up, but as in recognizing that we can't change what IS.. we can only be in charge of how we react and respond to what IS.

We took the boys to the "Haunted Trails" at Bastyr, last night- it was so fun! Pretty low key, and it just felt so good to do something that feels like a fun time.

In the ebb and flow of feelings and energy, it seems like we are in the 'flow" right now, which feels so damn good! We are all getting well, Logan is back to cooperating and even taking control, and I am trying to shake off my mantle of sadness that I have been lugging around for the last two weeks.

Diabetes IS sad.

But it also presents a challenge and a choice about how we are going to deal with this, and still have the life we want. We do need time to grieve our losses, and when we do, we create space in our hearts to start embracing the little joys again.

It's a fine line, and a tricky balancing act that we have to navigate to get through this.